


Where Is Your Lover?

by justburnitwithfire



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-08
Updated: 2016-02-08
Packaged: 2018-05-19 04:55:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5954398
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justburnitwithfire/pseuds/justburnitwithfire
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Everyone is concerned about Lexa, but she's just trying to win a war. She doesn't need all this misplaced worry.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Where Is Your Lover?

Lexa sat at the makeshift war table in her tent, absentmindedly twisting her dagger against the top of the table. The wood split were the tip was buried, but she only dug the blade deeper. Indra stood slightly to her left, towering over the commander’s lithe form as she studied the maps of all the known boundaries, borders, and threats waiting for them in the harsh wasteland of the Ice Nation territory.

“Will that be all, Indra?” Lexa asked in a weary tone. The long days of war talks and marching her massive army (though smaller without her soldiers from the north, but no less imposing) creeping over her battered and worn body. The fight with Prince Roan only a few days past, but the scars were still fresh despite how well she hid them. Indra gave a slight shake of her head before stopping and changing to a single nod.

“Actually, there is one more other thing,” she said. Her voice was steady, yet she hesitated to elaborate. She watched her commander, trying to gauge a response to her statement. Lexa’s forest green eyes never looked up from the maps laid before her.

“Speak true,” she demanded as she turned a few maps over in her hands, eyes roaming the eastern border of the Ice Nation. Indra watched momentarily, noticing the way her eyes only seemed to skim over the hand drawn lines before clearing her throat and continuing.

“There has been talk amongst your warriors. They are… concerned for you.” The effect was immediate and Lexa stopped her idle riffling.

“Concerned?” she repeated, dropping the maps in her hands onto the table. She turned to face Indra, eyes betraying no emotion. Indra nodded again.

“Yes, Heda. Concerned for your wellbeing,” she added. Lexa rose from her seat at the table and shoved her dagger into the sheath on her belt. 

“My injuries from the fight with Roan are minor. The best healers of Polis treated my wounds before we left on this conquest. There is no other more competent than I to lead,” she said emotionlessly and defiantly turned away from the table. Indra nodded and she followed Lexa at a distance into the conjoined room in her tent. The makeshift war room contained only a table littered with maps and a handful of chairs. The other rooming holding even less; a bedroll spread out on the earth and a single trunk containing the Commander’s personal effect. A roaring fire sat in the center to block out the frigid cold from outside the tent. Lexa marched up to the fire, basking in the warmth to clear her mind.

“Forgive me, Heda. They aren't concerned with your body as much as they are questioning your current state. They believe you to be frustrated.” The rushed words meant to rectify her meaning only seemed to agitate Lexa farther. She froze and turned back to face her general.

“We are at war,” she challenged, gesturing towards the forgotten maps in the other room.

“Heda…” Indra tried, but Lexa held up her hand to stop her.

“This is hardly a time for you or my men to be questioning my mental state. My past with the Azgeda will not stop me from-” she started again, but Indra cut her off before she could continue on her rant.

“You have not brought someone back to your tent in many moons, Heda.” The words were blunt and rushed, but halted Lexa’s train of thought.

“Oh.” Indra waited as Lexa processed this new information. Her warriors were worried because she had not been fulfilling her physical needs.

“Yes.” Indra confirmed after a moment of silence. Lexa straightened out her spine as she continued to turn her general’s words over in her head.

“They are worried… yes, I suppose that makes more sense,” she muttered as she rubbed at the bridge of her nose. Indra recognized the nervous habit, having been around the young commander for most of Lexa’s young life, but refused to acknowledge it. She was already treading into unfamiliar territory with her concerns. 

“I mean no disrespect, merely relying the worries of your men,” she continued, allowing Lexa the chance to sort through her thoughts. After another moment of silence, Lexa released a sigh and crossed back towards the war table.

“My bedding should be no concern to anyone. Dispel the rumors and end their worries. I am fine,” she demanded as she returned to her seat. Indra waited a moment before following. Lexa pulled her dagger back out, fingering the tip of the steel.

“May I ask you a question, Heda?” Indra asked, taking a seat in the vacancy on her left.

“If you are going to ask me why I return to my tent alone, then I suggest you listen to what I just told you,” Lexa repeated, refusing to meet Indra’s eye. She nodded at the words, but continued anyway.

“You care for the sky girl,” she stated. Neither woman mentioned the small trickle of blood oozing down a thin finger as the blade stilled in Lexa’s hand.  


“That was not a question.”

“Your warriors worry for you. This pent of frustration will only be a distraction on the battlefield. You cannot be any less of yourself when you meet them in battle. I am your general, but I have known you since before you became Heda. I speak out of my own concern.” For the first time since the beginning of their conversation, Lexa broke her mask of indifference. The green in her eyes seemed to darken as her mouth curled into a sneer.

“If you had been any other of my generals, Indra, you would have been dead long before this conversation. It is simply because of that that I allow such accusations alone. Regardless of my sleeping arrangements, I will not waver in this battle,” she snapped, her voice beginning to tremble with her silent rage. It was at that moment that Indra realized she had overstepped.

“Yes, Heda,” Indra said, an apology hidden in her voice. Lexa allowed her words to hang in the air for a minute before continuing. 

“Worry for the sky people. This is their first major battle since joining the coalition. I want you and Octavia to keep them in line.” Her words left no room for an argument as she slipped back into her usual stoic self, but Indra could tell there was a double meaning behind each word. Keep them in line. Keep them safe. Indra pushed back out of her chair and stepped towards the front of the table.

“Of course, Heda.” With a curt bow, Indra turned to leave. As she passed through the flap of the tent, a figure with blonde hair appeared on the other side.

“Hello Indra,” she greeted with a small smile. The hardened general merely grunted in response, leaving Lexa to address her new arrival. Clarke strolled into the war tent, noting the way Lexa tensed at her presence. “Indra seems like she’s a good mood.”

“Indra has some things that need to be taken care of,” she brushed off, gesturing towards the seat on her left as she placed the tip of her dagger on the arm rest and resumed twirling it absentmindedly. Clarke hummed in response as she moved to take the chair on Lexa’s right instead. 

“Does it have anything to do with your bleeding finger?” she asked, gesturing to the thin trail of blood on the appendage in question. Lexa moved her hand to hide the evidence, passing her dagger to her left hand, but Clarke grabbed it before she could cover it completely. 

“It is nothing,” Lexa reassured, trying to pull her hand out of Clarke’s grasp. The blonde hummed again, her grip never wavering. 

“Much easier to patch up than palms, that’s for sure,” she added, her fingertips grazing the fresh bandage covering Lexa’s hand. Lexa allowed the tender touch while the fingers on her left hand clenched around her dagger, the hilt rubbing against an identical bandage.

“I assume you’re here for more than just first aid,” she said, trying to deflect the conversation onto a more relevant topic. Clarke released her grip with a sigh and turned her attention back to Lexa.

“You are correct,” she replied, but made no attempt to elaborate. After an awkward pause, Lexa cleared her throat and gestured for her to continue. “What did Indra say to bother you? Is there a problem?” Two could play the deflecting game. Lexa’s face hardened slightly at her words, but she merely shrugged off the concern.

“No, there is no problem. Everything is well,” Lexa replied, moving forward to rest her dagger onto the table.

“And yet you’re not.” It was a statement rather than a question, Clarke’s blue eyes searching Lexa’s green as she relaxed back into her chair. Lexa refused to meet Clarke’s glance, instead turning her attention back to the maps on the table.

“There is nothing wrong, Clarke,” she reassured, trying to push the earlier conversation with Indra out of her head. Her eyes traced the map before her lazily, not really registering the words before her. She ignored the way Clarke shifted forward in her seat and when her hand loosely grasped her own.

“I know you,” Clarke pushed, but Lexa refused to bend at her words. She lightly brushed her thumb over Clarke’s hand, a sign of comfort, before withdrawing her own.

“And I know you. You’re not here to inquire about Indra, so why are you here?” Again, the game of deflection continued. Clarke sighed in defeat and reclined back into her chair. Lexa’s hand ached to reach for her, but she remained still.

“Your warriors are out there celebrating possibly the last night of their lives. Drinks, food, merriment. All that jazz. And you’re in here missing out. Why?” she asked, revealing her true intentions for the visit. Lexa felt her heart skip a beat at her words and tried not to read too much into it.

“I was to join them shortly,” Lexa assured her, trying to ease her worry.

“I see. So why don’t you tell me what your problem really is?” Clarke asked again. This time, there was no chance to deflect. Clarke had come clean with her reason for being there and now it was Lexa’s turn. Lexa frowned before nodding slightly in defeat.

“Again, there is no problem. Indra was merely speaking on… a personal matter. It was irrelevant,” she admitted, unable to look Clarke in the eyes. At this, Clarke moved forward again.

“Cut the bullshit, Lexa. What’s wrong?” she pleaded, searching Lexa’s face for any hints. Lexa relinquished her control in the conversation and nodded slightly before continuing.

“It appears my men question my ability to lead because of my lack of bedmate.” There was a charge in the air at the truth as Clarke processed the straightforward answer.

“Wait… they’re concerned because you’re not having sex?” she asked, trying to find the lie in Lexa’s words. A small blush crept onto Lexa’s face as she was unable to meet Clarke’s gaze for what felt like the hundredth time since she entered the tent. 

“Before battle, it is common for warriors to indulge themselves. Relieve their frustration and allow them to think clearly,” she explained, trying to distance herself from the conversation. To make matters worse, a small smile crossed Clarke’s face.

“And yet you’re not.” Another statement rather than a question. Lexa could feel her cheeks grow hotter as Clarke’s smile widened.

“No.” 

“Why?” Clarke pushed, trying to get the Commander to open up more about the subject. However, Lexa appeared to have reached her limit because she abruptly rose from her chair, pushing away from the table.

“I’ve spoken on this topic more than I’ve wanted to in one day. I’m perfectly capable of leading this army as I am. I don’t want to talk about this anymore,” she said, finally turning to face the blonde. Clarke nodded and rose.

“Alright, alright,” she replied, holding her hands up in surrender. Lexa released a breath she didn’t know she was holding, glad to be free from the questions. She grabbed her dagger from the table, tucking it back into it sheath on her belt. 

“Shall we go join in the festivities?” she offered instead, gesturing towards the entrance of the tent. Clarke nodded as she matched Lexa’s own hand gesture.

“After you, Heda.”


End file.
